Home Again

It’s good to be home. Baby is behaving and not whining as much as he was at Mom and Dad’s. Yay. Today is our resting day and I actually cooked a decently healthy meal. I like to stuff things into a pot and stew it for a bit so I diced up 2 tomatoes, a garlic herb chicken sausage, 1/3 of a big fat potato, and tossed in all my Italian seasonings. Not too bad if I do say so myself. This is my first good attempt at cooking in a long time. It’s just tiresome to figure out what to cook when you’re exhausted and need a quick fix before the baby demands all your energy and attention. So yay for baby steps in the right direction. Now if only I could eat more lettuce like I used to…

Now that Jesse is home, I can finally sign up for that yoga studio down the street. I need to nurture my body and have some time away from the baby. I’m probably going to sign up for 3 months of unlimited classes (yay for newbie specials!). I need to take care of myself, which is really hard as a new mom. But this is one of the first steps towards that. It’s really hard to separate all of the different facets of who I am, because I tend to stick myself in a box and stay there. Lately, I’ve been stuck inside the “Mom” box. At least the artist has been coming out to play more than I thought it would. And the engineer came out after spending the week with Mom and Dad. Again, today’s been a nice day to rest and recharge. Been working on some pretty cool pendants after sitting on ideas all week. Pictures when I get a chance and good lighting.

It’s interesting that Jesse and I are coming up on our 4 year dating anniversary. It takes some people 6 years before they get engaged, but we managed to date, get married, and have a baby in less than 4 years. Haha, go us! I’m just finally happy life has settled down a bit. Baby is progressing rapidly, my creative juices come and go but they’re definitely still there, my friends and family are awesome, and I have the best husband ever. What more could I possibly ask for? I never imagined my life turning out this way, but I’m happy it did.

Enough is Enough

I can’t stand it anymore, I’m cleaning off my workbench because I need to be near the window. As much as I love working at the eating table, I don’t like having the light on.

Bye Bye Clutter

My baby is still asleep and I really want to soak in the bath. Grrrr.

I’ve been gutting the clutter out of my apartment in hopes of sparking my creativity. My husband is seriously rubbing off on me in that regard. While I’m okay with creative clutter, it’s becoming more of a nuisance because I don’t want to clean it up later. I have better things to do with my time than spending it putting stuff away or tossing it out. So Fridays have become my “let’s tear this place apart” days. Hopefully we’ll find a house or move into a 2 bedroom soon. But that’s what Mom and Dad’s garage is for. At least for a little bit while I decide if I need to purge more stuff.

The time has come for me to try out the yoga studio down the street. My postpartum body isn’t what it used to be, and while I know it takes about a year to get back to normal, I need it to compliment my bellydance training as well as strengthen both my spirit and my body. I know my root chakra has been massively stuck closed and I need to get it a little bit open. That also means I should start gardening again too. I may start that after the yoga. The spring and sun is coaxing me outside more. And soon I’ll be needing to teach my kids how to garden and how the Circle of Life works. Planting seeds is a good way to teach that. Or just show them the Lion King but I don’t want to encourage Disney or TV in general. I’m still a hippie in that regard. As much as I miss watching Gilmore Girls for hours on end, I don’t need a TV just yet.

Okay, time for a nice soak before the monster wakes up. Oh, he eats beets, not brains.

Nesting Dreams

I’m longing for a proper sized desk. Not a bachelor’s table to fit him and his lady for dinner in his studio apartment. A nice desk for me to spread out my tools and photography station. A home for the iPad and my tea cup. Speaking of tea cup, I want a big Starbucks mug for lots of tea. Easy accessible drawers to stash my findings so I don’t have to get up and go find them in the cupboard. That’s fine for rocks and beads but not for findings. I’ll keep my wire in there too. Yes, I am expecting to have drawers on each side. Now that I think about it, I really want one that has a hutch so I can maximize my working surface area.

I keep my most treasured photos here and it would be nice to place them up higher. Close but not in the way. A wedding photo that’s probably the best one of us because we’re being our eclectic selves and you can see the spark that makes us disgustingly cute together. My best friend’s daughter when she was in that mischievous age of “Auntie Hui is going to steal my chocolate!”, my other best friend at our college graduation under the College of Engineering sign, a photo of my cousin’s wife with me as the flower girl when I was 6 (showing off my freshly painted pink nails), and a Snoopy and Charlie Brown frame of me as a teenager with my faithful German Shepherd. Maybe I’ll find a hutch with glass doors where I can put my He-Man DVD collection with the spine mural on display. I told Jesse I want the 30th Anniversary collector’s set because it has new interviews and a CD soundtrack. And more DVDs so I don’t have to worry about the first set getting old. It’s nice that most of the series as well as She-Ra is on Netflix.

I’m also looking forward to the day my little jewelry box can sit on my bathroom counter again, because the baby changing pad will be in the other bathroom and not mine. Or to have a large dresser with a mirror hanging over it so I can use it as a vanity. I need to figure out how to unlock my good jewelry box because I lost the key. Grrr. I’ll get Jesse to figure that out eventually, but I do have some statement pieces already out that I’ll make do with. I really enjoy being able to mix the jewelry I make with the nicer jewelry I’ve collected over the years.

Finding the perfect house is hard, but I believe our dream home is out there somewhere. With the economy as it is, we’re looking for a house we can settle in with our budding family as well as when all the little hatchlings fly off into the world on their own. I have to learn that it will only be quiet when the kids are asleep or old enough to sit and read quietly in a corner. So I may as well have my studio area out in the open instead of behind locked doors. I’ll just have to teach them to respect my space and designate beading supplies exclusively for them. I need to do that before Jesse.1 arrives for her Christmas visit. I have a week and a half to get that ready. So far I have string on the way and I just need to find my crimp beads and lobster clasps. I felt bad when she asked to make a necklace but I hadn’t had time to set everything up, let alone dig for stuff. So I need to make sure to do that this week. I should also get her a beading board to lay her projects out so she can see it more visually. I never needed one but it would be good to have.

I’m trying to be a good mom. But nothing we want to be great at is ever easy.

Soul Cleaning

This is what happens when I get a really good nap in the afternoon and Jesse is home to play with Hui.1.

I love my Dyson. I finally got around to emptying out the canister perfectly this time. Then I went for another go around the front room and there was a ton of crap I picked up. Yuck.

Finding time to make jewelry with a stubborn newborn really hasn’t been easy. I sleep when he sleeps to save my sanity. But it’s been a wonderful time to take a step back and figure out where I want to take this. I think I’ve been focusing on the selling aspect too hard and need to go more with the flow. Something is off balance but I’m not sure what. I just have to accept the disconnect and work through it. Cleaning like this makes me happy. I still have the other half of the room to tackle, which is my workbench. That’ll probably be harder to tackle but I’ll get to it and make it as nice as this half. Besides, I need to start baby proofing this room. >.<

Today I hope to finish and package an order then pick out stuff for my sister to sell at her office's holiday employee craft fair. It'll be a nice shift in energy since I need to figure out price tags and the like. Ever since Staples released the Martha Stewart line of office supplies, I've been itching to do something with it. It sings to my soul, just as much as old cottage and pink hybrid tea roses splattered around the garden, my sundresses, and tea cups. I've been resisting the urge to garden since I need to spruce up my patio before I start anything. Really, I need to spend some time out there sweeping and assessing before I go to Home Depot. My basil did well, mostly because I figured out the sprinklers were hitting the patio and I got free water. If I can figure out a better watering system, I'll start a new round of herbs and flowers. We've decided to stay here another year, so I have time to continue to cozy up the place.

And back to bed with me… Namaste.

Life… with a Baby

Life with a baby changes everything… at least I look like I haven’t changed much (you can’t see the stretch marks and I hide the flub well).  At least I don’t have to do the flub wrap.  Sashi can beat it out of me once I get the okay to get back to bellydancing.

I sleep when he sleeps.  He still randomly sleeps for 2-3 hours, sometimes a little more, but generally that’s the pattern, regardless if I swaddle him or not.  This week Jesse has been out of town on a business trip, so we’ve been staying with Mom and Dad.  It’s been really nice to have a cozy rocking chair nurse in and TV to watch.  As much as they’re not used to having a newborn in the house since me, they are really happy having us around.  Dad especially because Ming Ming will be his little shadow… yes, I made my dad a new little buddy.  Too cute.

At least I got Mom to mail out my package… I finally finished a 19″ box chain necklace for my biggest fan’s hubby and Mom happened to be going out.  Of course I didn’t get a chance to snap photos, shame on me, but I needed to get it out.  Grrr.  At least Mom saved me the hassle of rushing to the post office and rushing back home (new Mom separation anxiety, I’m sure), but I realized that I need 2 things to perfect my mailing system… better packing materials than stuffing the box full of Kleenex and Delivery Confirmation stickers.  I already have a stack of padded envelopes and Small Flat Rate Priority Mail boxes.  Oh, I also need to dig up my address labels and pre-label the boxes, if not the envelopes.  Hey, I just thought of that… not a bad idea.  At least I’ve trained Jesse well enough for him to mail things out.  But Ming Ming and I can easily run to the post office now that lockdown is over.  Dad’s worried about flu season, but it hasn’t started yet, so we’re still in the clear until the weather starts to cool off.

My little dude is growing exponentially.  It’s crazy.  He stares at his reflection in the mirror, he’s starting to smile, and he’s starting to fill out a heck of a lot more.  I understand why everyone says to enjoy this stage while it lasts, because it doesn’t last for very long.  Oy, I guess he is worth the lack of sleep and general zombie feeling.  Here’s a picture of him awake…

Random Burst of Energy

My little dude is having a serious growth spurt. Yesterday (including Monday night’s feedings into Tuesday), all he wanted to do was EAT. I think he slept for 2 hours at a time at the most, but mostly an hour on average. By morning, I had a cow, poked Jesse to be in charge and slept as much as I could by the time morning came. Last night, my boobs were heavy and achy because he sucked me dry and my body decided to make more milk. >.< Today wasn't much better… Eat eat eat, sleep for an hour or less. Right now he's been sleeping since 8, woke up for a diaper change and now just starting to wake up.

Been doing a TON of chainmaille lately. Part of it is my super duper secret squirrel project, the gold vertebrae necklace, and an order from one of my biggest fans for an oxidized box chain necklace for her hubby. This has been the part of lockdown I've really been enjoying. I do miss sleeping through the night though. Maybe stuffing this any full of milk is the answer to our problems.

My wedding china mugs came in! I need to dig out or make some longer earrings to test it out. I also have a bunch of stuff that needs tumbling. The humidity this summer has been really brutal. Eh, I will get to it eventually. I took an epic nap for probably about an hour and a half tonight. Maybe more. Once I finished eating, I handed the baby off to Jesse and seriously crashed. Baby slept like crazy for once, so I went on a cleaning spree. Threw out a ton of trash, organized the area under the vanity with all the diapers and wipes, sorted the laundry, and resisted the urge to Swiffer wet the bathroom and kitchen floors. I knew it would be too much to handle a d I still needed to play cow for the night. But I feel way better than most of today. So yay.

Postpartum Lockdown ~ Week 2

Hui.1 has attitude. He’s also eating a lot more so we stay up for most of the night. Definitely not the best part of the Mom job. At least we have some kind of routine down.  Last night was the most regular it’s been.  Hopefully this continues.  But here’s an idea of what my life consists of late:

Baby eat, sleep
I sleep
Baby eat, sleep
I sleep and/or eat
Rinse and repeat

I don’t function well until at least after 10am. And that’s usually when I get in my best nap. Then I’m a little bit more functional but it varies from day to day. It’s really nice having Jesse around to pick up the slack too. I do whatever my body allows me to do even if it means tidying up the apartment at 3am because I can’t sleep. I re-organized my workbench the other night and switched some framed posters around. On the wall with the crib, I’m going to take that one down and hang my little dragon talisman.

Creatively speaking, I only have so much time to myself, but I do have a few projects going. It’s fun and keeps my spirits up. Getting stuff done is another story all together though. My mind is racing with all the possibilities of shiny things to make. I’m simply limited on time, which is frustrating but I’m dealing. I’ve been feeling more inclined to cook so that’s a good sign. The weather is still pretty warm so I’m glad I’m missing that. It’s supposed to cool down into the low 80′s after the weekend. I hope so. Humidity sucks.

Last weekend I ordered my wedding china mugs for longer earrings.  Now I need to dig up some longer earrings or make some.  Here’s an issue I had with the tea cups…

Not the end of the world, but annoying at the very least.  I’m excited to have added to my china collection and to have a new prop.  Photography is really fun to learn.  I adore my camera and it won’t be awhile when I upgrade.  I’ll always use a point and shoot though.  I’ll leave the big gun DSL cameras to my dad and sister.  They’re Leica fanatics.  At least I have their cameras and epic lenses to play with if I ever feel inclined to test the waters.  But meh.  I have enough hobbies to keep me busy for a lifetime.  And a future career that needs further nurturing and launching.

Coming Full Circle

I’ve been on a Buffy kick lately. Started with the middle of Season 6, then 7, then 5. Tonight I felt compelled to watch the Season 2 Finale when Buffy invites Spike into her home. It made me feel very nostalgic and contemplating the stark differences between who I was then vs who I am now.

From a jewelry perspective, I was still dabbling here and there with sterling silver chain and Swarovski crystal. But not as much for some reason until the summer before college. My sister bought a bunch of stretchy string bracelets with 3mm crystals, so my oldest sister and I made a trip to Bead District in Downtown LA in search of tiny crystals to make our own bracelets. Then college got in the way until a few years later during an organized bonding day of making crystal dolls with the Cal Poly Pomona student chapter of Society of Women Engineers. That got me back into my beads again and never really stopped since then, save for a short period of time when all I wanted to do was knit.

Chainmaille didn’t happen until late 2006. By then I was done with school with the hope of changing the world one traffic signal at a time. Oh, how I miss that naivety. I admit that ideal fell out of place real quick. I knew I was bored with my jewelry skills but I kept chugging away anyway, like any dedicated artist would. Even the difference between who I am now vs who I was when I started chainmaille is huge. Personality-wise, dreams, goals, skills. It’s all very strange. I have a husband. I have a baby. I’m a bellydancer. I’m a chainmaille master. I equate bellydance with chainmaille skills… In order to make anything your own, artistically, you need to have not only strong skills, but soul to go along with it. Between Aislyn’s philosophy about jewelry design and Sashi’s Spirit of the Dance, I fully understand what it all means. You need both sides to create the whole. A yin yang, sun moon, light dark, right brain left brain, etc. That is how you become the best artist you can be. By taking your skills and applying yourself to those skills and BAM! you have your own unique personal style.

I don’t know what the future holds and it would be silly to try and figure out what it will be. All we can do is sit back and enjoy the ride, even if it means calloused feet, sore breasts full of milk, random sleeping hours, too much Buffy, and dented thumbnails from chaining beads to make linked necklaces.

This Week…

Jesse.1 is coming for a visit this weekend… which means this week is a good excuse to tidy up the apartment.  Even I’ve been lagging on the maintenance front.  Blah.  But, I really want to get the apartment in tip top condition before the baby arrives, because then it’ll really be a mad house.  So, that’s the goal for the week.  I want to start tonight and at least get the changing pad and baby basket (car carrier) stroller out of the boxes.  The changing pad will go to Mom and Dad’s and the stroller needs to find a home.  I’m almost tempted to get another layer of shoe rack, but I think it’s too heavy for me to lift, so I’ll wait until post-baby.

After I get my cleaning tasks out of the way tonight, I need to sit down and write out those two earring designs into my jewelry cookbook.  I’ve already started consolidating my notebooks (1 at least), so that needs to be put away as well.  I’ve been very good about resisting buying new journals and notebooks.  Believe me, as a self-designated office supply whore, it’s been really hard resisting the back-to-school supplies, Martha Stewart journals, and Shabby Chic journals. :-X

I already have 3 orders for earrings, so I need to finish the project I really want to mail out before the baby comes.  If I’m lucky, I can get the earrings done also before the baby, but my friend doesn’t need them until the holidays, so I have some leeway.  Really, we’re done with baby stuff and it’s just playing the waiting game now.  Jesse insists we go out at least once during the week before we’re confined to the apartment.  I’m fine with that, regardless of the fact that I must insist that it is not Asian food unless it’s Hawaiian or Korean BBQ.  Hey now, I need my meat and Asian food is heavy on rice and noodles, unfortunately.  Besides, I just want a juicy hamburger or a steak I can sink my teeth into.  And a salad instead of french fries. /sigh  Soon… I will have all the carbs I want!  And a screaming newborn.  Oh boy…